Monday, January 19, 2009

Caution: Boob Talk Ahead!

Well it only took 11 months of waiting to hear back from the second plastic surgeon Peter, that, Yes, in fact I can have implants (from a surgical perspective)! My first surgeon, Mark, was very unsure that with my DEIP procedure (insert bilateral, radical mastecomy here) if there would be anything to attach an implant too.
I really like Mark and respected his ability to say he had limits - it takes a strong person to tell the that kind of truth, but it was a hard pill to swallow thinking that my chest would forever look like a fat boy's. I guess I didn't realize how much I needed to hear that there was the possibility that I could look like a female again.

Off Darcy and I trekked to Vancouver to meet Peter (very nice guy) - Oh how I love getting half naked in front of a total stranger - please take a look at my scarred chest, with fake, un-tattooed nipples that look more like cat tits...but it was worth it, and then to meet Peter's nurse, Toni - who for the first time in over 2 years, made me feel pretty and normal and like a real woman just by letting me put a stupid little saline bag in this special bra. I looked in the mirror and saw someone I hadn't seem in years - me! (Nearly lost my cool, right there - took every ounce of flesh on the inside of my cheek and lip to hold that composure.) Of course I wasn't beyond begging for the ability to get to keep this special contraption, but alas I could not persaude Toni to give me her magic bra.
Of course with everything that is Me, I couldn't have just all good news, there had to be some catch to it all - I must wait 6-8 weeks for the medical system to decide if I'm worth getting boobs, and of course the 18 month plus wait to get a surgery date with Peter. But I don't care, there is a possibility that with in 2 years I could not be mistaken for a guy, that no nurse will call me "Sir", and that maybe I might just turn my husbands head again.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Why Bother?

Ever get to the point where you wonder - Why Bother?
Every now and then I do, usually after having to deal with stupid people who hurt my brain due to their dim-wittedness, but today it's different. I'm not sure if it's because I've been trapped in the house on my days off due to being so sick and 'cabin fever' is setting in, or if I'm getting trapped in my own world of perplexity!
Damn you TV and your mind sucking, social skill preventing, deathly quiet when off, evilness!